by Aline Mello

Question:  If God is about love, compassion, kindness, why are Christians so judgmental?

This question is one dear to my heart.  If the God Christians serve is all about love then why aren’t Christians also all about love?  Why must we judge and persecute when Jesus came proving God’s all-encompassing love?  If “Christian” means “a person who exemplifies in his or her life the teachings of Christ,” then why don’t we do exactly that?

When I hear stories about how Christian groups were protesting at gay soldiers’ funerals or holding picket signs at abortion clinics, I get two drastically different reactions: first, I get angry.  I don’t see how picket signs can show Jesus’ love.  I don’t see how one person who passes by a sign saying “God Hates Gay People” will decide to suddenly run towards God with love in his/her heart.

Then, after the anger swiftly fades away, I feel my heart breaking.  What kind of God are we serving?  Are we serving a harsh God who writes down our shortcomings and looks at us with contempt?  Or are we serving One who is kind, and looks at us with love in His eyes?  I think it comes down to this: If your God is a judging, harsh God, then that is the way you will show Him to others.  If He is love and forgiveness, then that is the way you will depict Him.

Now, there is another side to this.  We shouldn’t judge non-Christians as if they know better.   We shouldn’t approach the atheist and demand he stop having sex with his girlfriend.  It makes no sense.  When we approach that atheist we need to address the bigger and more foundational issue: the fact that he doesn’t know Jesus.  However, what if he isn’t an atheist?  What if that guy having sex with his girlfriend is someone in our small group?  Someone we see in church raising his hands, worshipping God on Sunday mornings? Paul is very clear when he writes,

“I told you not to associate with people who indulge in sexual sin.  But I wasn’t talking about unbelievers who indulge in sexual sin, or are greedy, or cheat people, or worship idols. You would have to leave this world to avoid people like that.  I meant that you are not to associate with anyone who claims to be a believer yet indulges in sexual sin, or is greedy, or worships idols, or is abusive, or is a drunkard, or cheats people. Don’t even eat with such people.  It isn’t my responsibility to judge outsiders, but it certainly is your responsibility to judge those inside the church who are sinning.  God will judge those on the outside; but as the Scriptures say, “You must remove the evil person from among you.” -1 Corinthians 5:9-13 (emphasis added).

We should not be OK with sin in the church.  Yes, we’re all human, but we are also responsible for holding each other accountable.  It’s the point of having community, of going to church in the first place.  If I don’t want a fellow believer to come up to me and call me out on my sin, then I shouldn’t be hanging out with believers.  If Joana does call Rita out, it doesn’t mean Joana is perfect.  It means she cares enough about Rita, and loves her enough, to want her to live in righteousness, giving glory to God in all she does.  And when Rita sees Joana needs a little nudge, she can do the same thing.

We need to be careful in the way we treat this.  If we approach someone about their sin, in order to exhort and encourage them into the right path, we must do it out of love, not out of judgment.  If we see someone standing on ice that’s breaking, we will warn him against standing there, and try to make him come back to solid ground.  It’s out of love and concern.  Whether we approach an unbeliever or a believer, we must do it out of love, be it in admonishing the believer or showing God’s love to an unbeliever.   Either way, it’s good news!  It’s always God, the Savior, ready to save us again.

I heard a message one time that said this phrase: “God’s intention is love.”  And the preacher told us to look at the Bible as a love story.  Yes, even the Old Testament.  If we look at the Old Testament stories and see God as a lover, a husband, then we start understanding the things He did when His people, His lover, start worshipping other idols and committing adultery.  His intention is love.  So He sends Jesus to die for us so that we can be close to Him again.  Good news?  When Jesus died for us, He cleared the way so we could approach God without hesitation.  Jesus atoned us; we’re clear.

“So, friends, we can now—without hesitation—walk right up to God, into ‘the Holy Place.’ Jesus has cleared the way by the blood of His sacrifice, acting as our priest before God. The ‘curtain’ into God’s presence is His body.” -Hebrews 10:19-21

I heard someone say one day that salvation is not cheap it’s priceless.   Sometimes we act like it’s cheap, don’t we?  We treat His blood like an overused napkin.  “It’s OK, God forgives.”  And He does.  But if we are treating His forgiveness with such carelessness, then we don’t understand His love.  If we know about God’s humongous love, then we are floored by it.  We are absolutely amazed by it!  We don’t treat it lightly.  His love compels us to live righteously, to give it all up to Him.  His love overflows inside of us compelling us to run to the unbeliever to show him that same love.  His love drives us towards the believer to tell her about God’s love and about how His love is so much better than any sin.  But in order to have that love we have to “walk right up to God.”  Jesus didn’t die for us so we could stand around.  He died so we could have access to the Father and actually approach Him.  And this is how we can get to know God for who He really is and not just who we think He is.

In Luke 6:36, Jesus says, “Our Father is kind; you be kind.”  What does that mean?  That I not bother that girl in my class about Jesus?  That I ignore the guy I serve with at church who is living in sin?  I don’t think so.  I think it means that I act in love and not in judgment.  I think it means that I show that love that I’ve received from Him to that girl in my class.  That I tell her about how absolutely amazing He is.  I think it means that it I approach that guy I serve with—in love—and remind him of righteousness, and be there for him as he begins to walk in God’s path once again.

His love is big enough for everybody.  His blood is powerful enough to cover a multitude of sins.  When we get that, I mean really, really get it in our hearts, not our minds and understanding, but in the depth of who we are, then we are able to approach Him and receive His love.  We are able look at others the way He does.  We are able to love them like He wants us to.

About a week ago, David Stephens challenged us to read one chapter of the book of John per day. Day 1 came . . . and went. And I forgot to read the first chapter. Sometime around the afternoon of Day 2 I remembered and carved out some time in my schedule to read (and catch up).

I have to be honest, I’m not a big fan of the  Bible reading plans–whether it’s one chapter a day or reading through the entire Bible in a year. I know many people love those types of reading plans, but I personally found it a bit stifling in the past. However, those plans do add discipline to being devoted to the Word of God (and let’s face it, we could all use some discipline in that area of our faith!). So, I mix it up a little bit, to make it less regimented and more faith-building for myself. My approach is to ask the Holy Spirit to speak to me through just one part of the assigned reading. It could be a few words or a few sentences long, but He never fails to make just a small part of my reading jump off the page at me. On Day 6, here’s where we settled today:

Jesus Walks on Water (NLT)

¹⁶ That evening Jesus’ disciples went down to the shore to wait for him. ¹⁷ But as darkness fell and Jesus still hadn’t come back, they got into the boat and headed across the lake toward Capernaum. ¹⁸ Soon a gale swept down upon them, and the sea grew very rough.¹⁹ They had rowed three or four miles when suddenly they saw Jesus walking on the water toward the boat. They were terrified, ²⁰ but he called out to them,“Don’t be afraid. I am here!”²¹ Then they were eager to let him in the boat, and immediately they arrived at their destination!

Life is full of seasons of transition: moving from preschool to grade school, from grade school to middle/high school, college, relationships, marriage, children . . . the list goes on and on. Being in your 20′s is a state of transition. You’re technically an independent adult but may still be in school (in or out of state), living with your parents, or in-between jobs (probably trying to figure out what it is you want to do with your life). You may change your major half a dozen times. Or you may stick to one major, graduate, and then realize that’s not what you want to do at all. Or you may have no idea what to do with your degree.

The one thing we tend to do as human beings, is let God in on the process.

That evening Jesus’ disciples went down to the shore to wait for Him . . .

Like the first twelve, we go down to the shore to wait for Jesus–His presence, His love, His direction, His instruction. And, like the first twelve, we get impatient. When He doesn’t come to meet us according to our expectations, when the sun has set and darkness has come upon us, we bail. We get restless, afraid, insecure. And we hop into our boats and go on without Him heading home toward Capernaum.

I wonder: what would have happened if the disciples had simply waited for Jesus to return and then gotten into the boat with Him from the beginning? Would they still have encountered the gale that made sailing rough that night? Did the disciples, in a way, force Jesus’ hand by being impatient? In other words, did He have to break through their lack of devotion by walking on the water in order for them to let Him in the boat and get precisely where they needed to be? We can speculate, debate, and theorize, but we’ll never really know. At least not in this lifetime.

But here’s what we do know: with Jesus in the boat, the journey is a lot less dramatic and a lot faster.

How many times have we prolonged what God wants to do in our lives simply because we won’t allow ourselves the benefit of having Him in the boat with us?  Don’t misunderstand: God loves to show Himself strong on our behalf. And He is more than able to do so.

Job 9:8

He alone has spread out the heavens and marches on the waves of the sea.

 

But the evidence of His presence in our lives, in our hearts, should be displayed in our character, not inspite of our character. What does the evidence of Christ’s character in our lives look like? Perserverance. Being patient in the process, both with Him and with ourselves. Waiting for Him, even when we don’t feel like it.

We are all perpetually on our way SOMEWHERE. Transition is not something that we can outrun. Likewise, we cannot outrun the process of getting wherever it that we’re headed. Why not spend that time with Jesus and spare ourselves the dramatics?

In the past, Summer and I have had the joy of walking close friends through their relationships, dating/courting, and all the way up to the altar.  Seeing how we dated for 4 years, and have been married for over 8 years now, we have a little bit of experience to be able to share from.  Being able to take close friends “under our wing” and pass on what we’ve learned (and wish we had learned!) when we were dating is a humbling and awesome experience.  We love helping 2 people navigate all the way from the “butterflies” in the stomach to, if it’s in God’s play book, vowing “’Til death do us part.”

Lately, I’ve been on this vision kick, about having vision for all areas of life.  And the area of romance is no exception.  So, here’s your 5 minute thought of the day:

If you’re in a relationship, what is that relationship about?  Why are you dating that person?  For what purpose? 

The reason I ask is that in Christianity, especially in Christian relationships, we are notorious for being known for what we are AGAINST.  And, if we’re not careful, we’ll create a list of Don’ts (don’t be at each other’s house after midnight alone, don’t be in each other’s bedrooms, don’t do anything we wouldn’t do if our parents weren’t in the room, etc) and let that list be what guides our relationship.

But what if your GPS just said, “Don’t turn here” when you were driving?

What if you really had no idea why you were in the car or where you were going?  All you knew was that you weren’t supposed to turn here… or here… or here… or there.  Yeah, you might eventually get somewhere but that trip is going to be really frustrating!

But that’s what many relationships are like.  Do this & don’t do that.  Hear me out, having a list of Do’s & Don’ts (Boundaries) is a good thing b/c it gives you a concrete “fence” that you don’t cross.  Fences are good because they keep the bad stuff out & keep us from wandering out into traffic!  But, if all you see is a fence keeping you from doing what you truly want to do, you’ll begin to resent your boundaries & look for ways to get around them.

But what if we actually crafted a statement that let us know WHY we had our Do’s & Don’ts?  That’s why I believe you need to have some sort of vision or purpose statement written out for your relationship. 

So, what if you and your boyfriend sat down and wrote out something like this,

Our relationship is about Jesus!  We will have a relationship that is above reproach, that honors God not only when people are looking, but even when they aren’t.  By guarding each other’s emotions and respecting each other’s bodies, if God leads us to marriage, on our wedding day we will stand before each other with smiles on our faces, having no regrets.  Our relationship will be a model of purity, honesty, love, joy, and patience!

Obviously, that’s going to be different for every couple, but even having one sentence is better than nothing!  Having a vision out in front of you leading you & guiding you will help to give your relationship motivation, direction, passion, and purpose.

On top of that, a written purpose will give context to your boundaries and, whenever your boundaries aren’t explicit, you can always look back to your purpose.  People try to create boundaries without a vision so it becomes a list of what other people expect you to do or good ideas.  But if you have a purpose written out, you are reminded of WHY you have those boundaries… and whenever your boundaries aren’t specific, you can look back to your written pledge to honor God regardless of who’s watching.

If I live more by “I WILL glorify Jesus in my relationship” than “I won’t do this or this or this or this” it’s life giving.

And, on a side note, a lack of purpose in relationships is a HUGE reason why some couples who remain pure before marriage, have troubles being intimate after marriage.  Because, instead of saying, “WOW, I really want to have sex, but I love you & Jesus enough to wait until we cross the line of marriage” (Purpose), we’ll say things like, “We can’t do that” and “We can’t go in your bedroom” (Boundaries).  And we are led by our boundaries instead of our purpose.  And what happens is a “sex is bad” mentality creeps into your relationship, and later on, your marriage.  But if you have a purpose & understand that something like sex is AMAZING… inside marriage… it paves the way for long-term success in marriage instead of short-term success in dating.

So have fun in your relationship.  Be led by your vision more than your don’ts.  And show the world the joy that can be found in a relationship devoted to the glory of God!  God bless.

To be honest, I’m not “the vision guy.”  I’m not the guy with a 10 year vision for every area of life… and, to be honest, I’m not sure if I want to be!  I find it exciting to follow the leading of God and walk through the doors He opens.  But I also know that, without vision, I will often walk through the wrong doors and end up 6 months+ down the wrong path!  

Vision gives Direction, Motivation, Passion, and Purpose, and if we are ever going to live a life that says, “Follow my example as I follow the example of Christ” then we’re going to need to have a vision for life.

God has been impressing on me lately to become a person more led by vision than my own feelings for the day.  And I believe that, if we would truly become people with a vision for life, then our generation (who is largely without a vision for life) would stand up and follow.

We talked briefly about this last week (head over to www.fusionatl.org/downloads to listen to the “Follow Me – Vision” message), but I want to expound on it a little bit more here.

In becoming a person of vision, you first off have to know what vision is!  There’s a lot of confusion in terminology floating around.  Your purpose & your vision & your goals are different things.  This might help…

Your PURPOSE is the sun and your VISION is the planet(s).

Your PURPOSE is the reason you exist.

This should go without saying, but without a purpose, you can’t have a vision to help you fulfill that purpose.  So, no purpose = no vision.  If you are a Christian, whether you know it or not, your PURPOSE is to bring glory to God.  So, the next question is, “How do I do that?”  Well, that’s where your VISION comes in.

Your VISION is what you do with your life.  Vision is the strategy behind the fulfillment of your purpose.  Your vision(s) circle around your purpose like the planets around the sun.

Andy Stanley said, “Vision is a clear mental picture of what could be, fueled by the conviction that it should be.”  If you’re looking for a vision, you often don’t have to look far beyond what your “burden” is.  What gets you upset in life?  What makes you slam your fist on the table?  What is a source of discontentment in your heart?

Granted, there are going to be differing areas of life that there is discontentment in, but that’s probably b/c you should have vision for different areas of your life: Life in general, relationships, finances, work, etc.

What’s something that could be that absolutely SHOULD BE!?!  Your answer will be different than mine… and that is a good thing.  We are created by God with different passions.  What’s yours?

Next, you accomplish your VISION by creating short-term GOALS to keep you on course.

Your VISION is the planet and your GOALS are the moons.

The famous painter Van Gogh once said, “I dream my painting and then I paint my dream.”  His vision was the completion of paintings, each uniquely different from the other.  How he accomplished his vision was a series of short-term goals, i.e.- brush strokes.

Like Van Gogh, when you close your eyes, what do you see that could and should be in the world?  Okay, open your eyes.  It’s now time to set up some Goals to accomplish that Vision.  What are your brush strokes to accomplish your Vision?

Maybe a few examples might help:

Perhaps one of my burdens is that people are struggling financially.  And, if my purpose is to be a shining light of Jesus, one of my vision’s might be to be a radically generous person.  And, in order to accomplish that vision, one of my goals might be to give away $1,000 this next year to someone to bless them.  Now, my next step is to come up with a strategy to accomplish that goal (but that’s the subject of another blog!).

The burden was that 42, 314,296 20-something’s in America are without Jesus.  And, since our purpose is to bring glory to God, our vision was to create a place to engage that generation with the Gospel of Jesus.  We believed that a relevant ministry to 20-something’s COULD and SHOULD exist.  So we set up a series of goals to accomplish that vision, the first being a small group of 20-something’s in ‘98.  And now here sits Fusion, engaging 20-something’s with the good news of Jesus!

But do we just sit back now?  No!

The accomplishment of your vision can be the launching pad of your next vision.

We still have the same purpose and the same burden, but since we have accomplished one vision, we move further down the path God has for us.  Thanks for being a part of the next step of the vision.

I DO my goals to ACCOMPLISH my vision to BE my purpose.

Be a person of vision.  Pick up your brush and start painting.

July 23, 2009 - What would our lives look like if we actually pursued holiness? But why should we? Why does God call us to be holy as He is holy?

July 16, 2009 – 99% of the time we walk around with tunnel vision, completely oblivious to the world around us. What if we prepared our minds for action? What if we opened up our eyes and saw the people & the pain that surrounds us & then did something about it? What if we paid it forward… taking a minute or two & buying someone’s lunch/dinner & talking to them? Give it a try & see what God does…

July 6, 2009 – What happens when you redeem your ordinary moments? Liz brings an encouraging word about being ready to listen & love people… and living in the moment.

July 2-5, 2009 - As followers of Jesus we’re called to live pure AND generous lives. And through that life, we have the opportunity every single day to share the Good News of Jesus with those around us. Watch in to learn how to join with your generation in creating a life that gives itself away.

June 29-30, 2009 – As followers of Jesus, we have power & authority to heal the sick! And it’s time for us to do just that. Today kicks off our tour date to pray for the sick, so watch & find out why & how!

June 24-26, 2009 – Most churches are waiting for the broken to come to them; well we’re gonna be a church that goes to the broken! Come join us on June 27th, 2009 for Adopt-a-Block with the Atlanta Dream Center!